Random Thoughts ... Weather Forecast for Tonight: Dark.  Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning. Cloud nine gets all the publicity, but cloud eight actually is cheaper, less crowded, and has a better view. Have you ever noticed, in traffic, anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac! "Would you look at this idiot? Take a look at this idiot right here, just creeping along... Woah, look at that maniac go!"  I feel sorry for confetti. Its useful life lasts about two seconds. And it can never be used again.  Those who dance are considered insane by those who can't hear the music.  I never eat sushi. I have trouble eating things that are merely unconscious. When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say? When someone asks you, A penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny? If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted? When someone is impatient and says, "I haven't got all day," I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day? If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? What if there were no hypothetical questions? Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong. Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to? Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with. May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2? Electricity is really just organized lightning. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting? I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.   More Jokes ...  Thursday, 9 December 2004